Responsibility is always the first step of freedom.
Anyhow, a few minutes into our stretching one of the bigwig senior managers from our regulatory department came over and loudly said to me whom she knew “You know, you’re making the rest of us unfit people look bad.” Uh, okay. She felt strong enough about it to tell me. I thought she was trying to make me feel bad.
In my mind, she’s being a beeeyotch! Sorry, I know that language is scarce in this space, but it’s my blog. So go ahead, change the channel if you don’t like it.
I had an imaginary retort back “Oh yeah, I didn’t know I was responsible for how you felt. Feel free to ignore what I do from now on, if it’s going to make you feel bad…please.”
In actual fact, all I did was nod in acknowledgement to let her know I heard her complaint, because that’s what it was. Then I carried on stretching.
What I’m trying to say here is, you are responsible for how you feel. Only you are responsible for how you react to any outside stimuli. If I had reacted to the exchange above in the same way I enacted it in my head, I might as well have put my personal power on a platter and given it away right then. Here you go, you’re now in the driver’s seat of my life, I’ll just be a passenger. Thanks, but no thanks!
But then you say, that person was deliberately trying to make you feel bad. Shouldn’t I have replied back and put her in her place? Or at least said something. I could, but I didn’t because I was aware of what was happening.
That lady was directing at me her mild angry energy, brought on by the belief that we were showing off and making her look bad. At the core of it, she felt less for being unfit. Because that’s the emotion underneath that’s drove her actions.
I felt her energy the moment she stepped close enough into my energy field. Most people would respond by matching her energy of mild annoyance or worse, take it up a notch to outrage with their reaction. Even though the emotion nor the energy isn’t theirs.
But because I was aware, I knew how to separate her energy from mine. I decided not to take on her anger. No mistake, I still reacted to her through the little mental dialogue. However I knew enough that as her action and words are a reflection of her beliefs, they’re hers. Only hers. Not mine. Any reaction from me is a reflection of my beliefs. They’re mine. My belief was I didn’t want to suffer achy muscles.
So the next time you find yourself in a heated situation, it’s good to remember that you can take charge of you how you react. Just take a big deep breath. Say to yourself silently with intention “what’s mine is mine, what’s yours is yours” and stay true to your inner core being. This way you can skirt around other people’s dramas without being pulled into them….unless you choose to, of course.